The Good Kind of Tired

I'm sort of tired. But it's a good thing. I'm tired because I've spent the weekend helping my friend Jackie get married off to Peter. For many reasons, I don't know that I can think of a better way to use my time or a reason to complain about being tired. It was worth it. Basically... because I really love these friends of mine, and am so grateful that I get to be a part of their lives.

Many of you who read this know Peter and Jackie, and know how great they are, so hopefully this won't be a cheesy post. But in many ways, they've just really been a means of grace in my life, and I can say with certainty that God put these two crazy kids in my life, and it's been incredible to see how my friendship with Jackie in particular has grown. She does a great job of loving on me, accepting me, and reminding me of the things that I often like to forget. In a lot of ways, she has become like a sister to me, and I find myself saying thanks to God for her most days. She also lets me share in her life, and I love it! And Peter's just good fun, as well as an exceptional teacher. I've never known Peter and Jackie apart-I met them when they had already been dating about a year or so. And what can I say? They belong together.

Why am I rambling about them? I am rambling because I felt like I got to be a part of something truly special and meaningful this weekend. I cried as Jackie walked down the aisle, and not because I normally cry at weddings (which I don't). I cried because I have been given the enormous privilege of walking with her through life over the past year and a half, through a lot of hard times and some good ones. And to get to finally see her on that walk down the aisle... something we've talked about a LOT... it was so beautiful to me. I just kept thinking, "wow. these are two amazing people. and i get to share life with them. and i get to share this moment with them."

I am tired and drained and exhausted, but I wouldn't have traded this weekend for anything. It was a beautiful thing to get to serve jackie and peter in small ways and to just be able to love them in a fraction of the way that they have loved me.

I guess that's part of what community is. getting to share in the happy and sad moments, and finding ways to serve each other. it's about really, truly understanding that we are brothers and sisters, and finding ways to love on each other. having this weekend has reminded me of how many ways in which God loves me through His redemption, His sacrifice, His provision and His community.

So here's to you Peter and Jackie... you guys rock.

Summer is on its way

one paper, one test, and one short presentation to go before the end of the semester. whew! yay! and i am not taking classes this summer, so i am very much looking forward to a class-free few months! i am also looking very much forward to reading some non-seminary books. i already have a couple of ideas of things to read, but am up for other ideas...i'd love to hear your best fun-summer-reading ideas.

Confusion and Chaos

It's been a crazy week or two, filled with whirling, crazy thoughts, and there is lots to figure out. When i have times like these, i often remember these words:

"My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road, through I may know nothing about it. Therefore I will trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone."
-Thomas Merton, from Thoughts in Solitude

sometimes i don't have words of my own to describe my state of mind, where i am, or where i would like to be. i'm so thankful that God works in all of us so that we can give each other words.